Igloo

When I was younger I had a favorite movie that I would watch over and over until I had almost every line memorized. It was a twisted, dark, corny hack of a movie, but I identified with it for some reason. One particular part still pops up in my mind from time to time...

like the movie is playing before me again.

The characters from the movie murder the popular girl and marked sections of her favorite book: Moby Dick. They underlined one word to further convince the world that she was lonely and desperate for something... and that word was Igloo.

Here we are - a world full of people suffering through moments that seem unbearable and earth shaking. We hold on as tight as we can to anything bolted down... only to find out that nothing ever really is.

If I didn't have you Lord, I don't know what I would do. I am in a moment where the only word I can seem to pull from inside me is IGLOO, and I am so afraid because I have never really been HERE before.

I need that power that you told me about. I need that strength for this new place I am in. I need a light to break through and tear down the dark places. I am not struggling with some deep decision about what to do and where to go from here, I am struggling with things that I have no choice in. With things that are completely paralyzing me. I can't cry too much. I can't hurt enough. I can't ... because it just keeps coming from somewhere. Some Igloo. Some place I wish I could shut off.

I used to have a fortress to RUN to, and now it seems to have became nothing more than a cold, meaningless IGLOO!